Organized Charm: NYNL Day 29: Be Careful Who You Tell

Wednesday, January 29, 2014

NYNL Day 29: Be Careful Who You Tell



Shhhh…
Today is all about secrets. Or, at least, not broadcasting all of your life information to everyone you know. And no, I’m not talking about posting Facebook statuses about what you had for breakfast (but… you know… please don’t do that either). 

I’m talking about this: 

Telling someone your Identity Goals makes you less likely to achieve them.

Which goals are Identity Goals? The ones that are personal. The ones that will change you a little bit as a person once they are completed.

The biggest one that comes to mind is when (at the beginning of the year, every single year) people start announcing via social media: I have decided to stop smoking! Everyone (me, included) responds with things like good job! and I’m so proud of you! 

And unfortunately, a few weeks later… the goal is abandoned. 

Why does that happen? 

Check out this 3:16 minute TED Talk by Derek Sivers:
Now, does this apply to all goals? No. What if you’re trying to start your own business? Obviously, you’ll need investors, support, etc. 

But here is the dangerous thing that we’re trying to avoid:

Telling others your goal makes it a Social Reality.
The satisfaction that you get from simply announcing the goal(s) takes away your motivation to actually WORK towards it. This is because, when it’s acknowledged by others, it feels real in your mind. 

So, carefully select your audience. Try to only announce goals and life plans to the people who will actually play a part in helping you achieve them.

And let the rest of the world be surprised by all of the awesome things that you do! :)


Sources:
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